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Goodbye 2017, Hello 2018

2017 passed me by. It has ended before I managed to fully take stock of my life and happenings around me. It went through like a whirlwind, leaving me stun and hanging…

The past year maybe a whirl but it leave its footprints. And what footprints they were. Marawi crisis, martial law in Mindanao, militarization, IP killings and systematic attacks on our democratic rights not to mention natural disasters. On the  personal level, I made more connection with my family, contributed to a collaborative book, distance myself from the noise of the "outside world" and spend more time grounding and immersing myself in communities of struggles.

While I was struggling to make sense of my life, the world has not stopped to help me figure it out. It clawed at me, waking me up from my stupor. I have already figured out a long time ago that I cannot live for myself alone. I cannot be someone with no accountabilities nor only think of mysel. The past couple of years have been that. A self-struggle to let go of my comfort zone and foray into the wider world of the unknown, while there is a bigger struggle out there. Bigger than myself. I delude myself into thinking  that these bigger struggles are not my "comfort zone", where I have learn to navigate twists and turns with other kindred souls. Ironically, these became mine and that of others, inevitably tangling me in its web.

 I bet the current year will be no different. I will still be assailed with doubts and of wanting to "escape", of leaving this orderly chaotic, uncertain and other times risky existence.  My steps may be sometimes tentative and faltering. I have come to realized that these are all being part of being alive, of being humanly flawed, while striving for humaneness as disheartening as they are as empowering.

 I may keep on treading a path that  presents bends and crossroads. I will acknowledge the fears and uncertainties, the tug of wanderings/wonderings, I know, will persist. Yet, I will also strive to be more introspective, to value people/s and be in solidarity with their struggles. For these, I pray for love for self and others, courage, humility, wisdom, open heart and clear mind as I journey in and with the mass of beings in these challenging times firmly holding on to the values of respect for others and sense of justice and freedom. May the current year bring me these and more.


Sugbu, Enero 2018



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